Always Love Me
by Gwynwidlen
Summary: Phil and Dan broke up, but still live together, which can lead to some awkward situations. M just to be safe. NOT EXPLICIT. NOT SMUT.


**Always Love Me**

**by Gwynwidlen**

**Summary: Phil and Dan broke up but still live together, which can lead to some awkward situations.**

**Rated: M. NOT EXPLICIT. NOT SMUT. M, just to be safe. **

**Warnings: I thought of this in the shower. **

**Enjoy!**

* * *

"Come on Dan, you have to get up." Phil said shaking his roommate awake. Dan groaned and rolled over, pulling the blanket over his head.

"Leave me alone Phil. I am not getting up." Dan replied.

"Not even if I buy your Starbucks?" Phil coaxed. Dan pulled the cover back a bit.

"And lunch?" Dan asked.

"If it means you'll get your butt out of bed, fine." Phil replied.

"Okay Dammit. Give me a few to take a shower and what not." said the younger male replied. Phil nodded. He watched Dan roll around in his bed, moaning in a mini-existential crisis.

"Leave now." Dan said, face buried in his pillow. Phil took his knee off Dan's bed, leaving his room with a sigh.

Dan and Phil dated for a while, but soon realized that their relationship couldn't survive the media. So they called it off but decided to live together still as to not arouse suspicion. Besides, they didn't end it badly. It was mutual.

"_Very mutual._" Phil thought to himself while he put on shoes.

Phil regretted breaking up with Dan almost immediately. He missed how close they were. He missed cuddling with him, waking up with him, being able to make a video together without it being awkward. He sighed again. Now it seemed like Dan really wouldn't care if Phil was around. Phil was just someone to hurt and make fun of, but it was OK cause he is the super gorgeous Dan Howell with a million fan-girls who would do anything for him. And Phil was just Phil.

He sat in his room, trying to keep himself calm.

Dan found him several minutes later curled up on his bed.

"Come on let's go." Dan said. Phil dragged himself off his bed and trudged toward the door.

"Hey Phil," Dan said. Phil turned around. "Your hair is messy."

Phil instinctively reached toward his hair, meaning to fix it.

"No, don't fix it. It looks good like that." Dan smiled, stepping out of the apartment. Phil stood there a bit shocked.

* * *

They got home several hours later than they expected to be gone. By the time they arrived home it was already seven at night.

"I'm going to shower. Unless you want to." Dan said. _"Or we could shower together..."_He thought to himself, biting his lip. Dan didn't want to break up with Phil. He was honestly hurt by the break up. But Phil seemed fine with it, like he didn't really care. So Dan decided he shouldn't care either.

He was tortured every day with thoughts of Phil. Phil's hair, Phil's smile, Phil's eyes. Phil, Phil, Phil. So he pushed his feelings aside. Dan poked fun at Phil in the hope that Phil would get fed up with him and leave. Phil never did.

It made him so mad. He wanted Phil to yell at him, acknowledge how much he was hurting him. Dan was really upset with hurting Phil. Sometimes, if he looked closely, he could see the hurt in Phil's eyes. Even if he was smiling and it broke Dan's heart. He just wanted to hug him and apologize.

But that wasn't their life. That _couldn't _be their life. Not as long as they were in the public eye.

"Nah, go ahead Dan. I'm gonna watch a movie or something." Phil replied, plopping on the couch. Dan nodded.

"Okay.. well.. see ya later." Dan replied as he left. He wanted to tackle Phil and kiss him all over. Dan got in the shower, and putting his head against the wall, he started to cry.

* * *

Phil sat on the couch, pondering life. Dan looked really hot today. Especially hot. Phil adjusted his jeans, feeling his face get a bit hot. He closed his eyes, willing his erection to go down. When it simply wouldn't, he listened to the shower running, and assuming he had enough time to do this, unbuttoned his jeans.

Dan kept floating through his mind. Phil bit his lip, trying to stay quiet. He remembered the time that Dan asked him to take a naked picture of him, holding the lion up teasingly.

"Dan.." the moan escaped his lips before he could stop it.

* * *

Meanwhile, Dan was getting dressed when he heard his name. It wasn't a call. It was breathy, pleasure filled _moan. _Leaving the bathroom only dressed in sweats, he finds Phil where he left him, in the living room. But now his pants were at his knees and he was masturbating fiercely.

"Dan.." Phil moaned again.

Dan didn't know what to do. He wanted to embarrass Phil but at the same time this was kind of hot, watching his roommate moan _his _name.

"Wow Phil." Dan said aloud not realizing what he had done. Phil jumped up, trying to pull up his pants. He finally manages it, embarrassed.

"Oh my god Dan, I didn't..realize you were..there." Phil said turning bright red. Dan smirked, playing it cool. Even though he was really turned on.

"Oh but you wanted me there didn't you. _Dan, Dan.. _" the brunette mimicked.

"I..I'm sorry Dan. It's just..." Phil bit his lip. "I still love you Dan. I still want you and I didn't want to break up. I just wanted what was best for you. I figured if you felt OK with breaking up, then I could try to be OK too. It's not working Dan. I love you and you are so beautiful.."

Dan's mouth hung open. He was shocked to hear this.

"Phil, you feel the same way? I thought it was just me! Why didn't you tell me this? I've tried to get you to leave me for like...ever now. I didn't want to break up either." he replied, stepping closer.

"What do you mean, 'get you to leave me?' Why would I leave you?"

"Well, I just felt like if I could get you to hate me that it would kill the feelings I had for you. It didn't really work." Dan admitted.

"Why would I hate you? Daniel.." Phil sighed closing his eyes.

"I'm sorry Phil.." Dan said. Phil pulled Dan into a hug.

"What do we do?" Phil sighed laying his head on top of Dan's.

"I want to be with you Phil." the younger boy replied.

"I want to be with you too Dan, but what about the fans?"

"Well.. they don't necessarily have to know. I mean, what we do off-camera is our business right?"

"I guess we didn't think of it like that." Phil replied.

"No...we didn't.." Dan replied.

"So what now?" Phil asked.

Dan looked up and wordlessly pressed his lips against Phil's. The older male kissed back.

"Let's go take care of that, shall we?" Dan said, breaking the kiss, he brushed Phil's erection. Taking his hand, Dan led him up to his bedroom.

* * *

**Fin.**

**This was supposed to be smut, but I don't feel like writing it like that cause it got too emotional. It was originally just a PWP. **


End file.
